05/29/2026
We are pleased to announce a revolutionary new movie-going option from Jack and Owen Draper called “Mommy Needs a Minute Childcare Services”. Here’s how it works:
Come to the theatre, simply drop your child off with Jack and Owen at the door, and enjoy a movie all by yourself at the Orpheum or Grand! Remember what it was like when you used to be able to go to a movie and just enjoy it without being interrupted with 4,000 questions all throughout, multiple trips to the bathroom (only to find out the little sq**rt didn’t really have to go, they just wanted to see the candy selection), or having to leave because your kid ate and drank their snacks way too fast and puked all over? Well, now you can relive those carefree movie nights once more! With Jack and Owen’s “Mommy Needs a Minute Childcare Services”, they promise to make sure your child is well taken care of and returned to you in one piece after the movie. If you should happen to leave the theatre after having an amazing and relaxing time only to forget that you had brought your little rugrat, fear not! Jack and Owen are licensed drivers and will be more than willing to drive your little pop-tart home. Still not sold on it? The numbers speak for themselves… In trial runs, they had a 93% success rate of reuniting the child with their parent! That’s nearly a perfect score!
Maybe you’re wanting to laugh with “The Breadwinner”, get lost in a galaxy far far away with “The Mandalorian and Grogu”, or enjoy a good old-fashioned “whodunnit?” mystery with “The Sheep Detectives”, whatever it may be, just relax, enjoy the movie, and know that your child is in somewhat capable hands.
*License pending. Also, please don’t be alarmed if you come to pick up your child after the movie and they’re all alone. Jack is probably just in the bathroom and Owen has a tendency to disappear at times, but never for longer that 10 minutes.